a dose of laugh - [or is it sanity?] - wed - 30th April 2008

Wednesday – 29^th April 2008

 

Don’t fail to pass the test

 

After having failed his exam in "Logic”, a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it.

Student: "Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?"

Professor: "Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!"

Student: "Great, well then I would like to ask you a question. If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an "A" for the exam. "

Professor: "Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?"

Student: "What is legal -but not logical, logical-but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?"

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor could not give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question.

He immediately answers: "Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 30 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife's lover an "A", although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical

 

vasus musings

if the teacher does not know

where and what homework

the student has been doing

but thinks logically 

and legally fails the student

the real answer could well defy logic

the student ends up getting his grade

while the teacher ends up loosing his bride

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echoes from silence - 12

Monday – 28^th April 2008

 

Me and my cross

 

why this duality?

its like a cross

 

how did the mind trick me?

it has lulled me

into thinking that

carrying the cross

 is a pleasure

to be savored

as a treasure

 

having made me

blissfully ignorant,

it has made me

nail myself to the cross

 

how did I do it

in the first place?

 

how can I remove the nails?

i cannot,

it has to be the master

 who must remove the nails

and set me free

 

 but then

why do I resist

thinking that the master

is trying to steal

my cross

 

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daily dose of laugh [or is it sanity?] - monday - 28th April 2008

Married Women are liars ……..  for a good reason

 

Monday – 28^th April 2008

 

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"

The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with sapphires.
"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked
The seamstress replied, "No"
The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a golden thimble studded with rubies.
 "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

Again, the seamstress replied,  "No."
The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble.
'Is this your thimble ?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water.

When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"
The Lord dipped into the water and came up with George clooney.

"Is this  your husband?" the Lord asked.
 "Yes," cried the seamstress.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! that is an untruth!"

The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord.  You are misunderstanding.

You see, if I had said 'no' to George clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband.  Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three.

Lord, i would not be able to take care of three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George clooney.

vasus musings 

know ye gentlemen

when a married woman lies

it's for a good and honorable reason

whether or not it is often

 

all cannot be clooney or pitt

but why become loony or quit

if our turn is third in coming first

 

so if the woman says  - you are gods gift

lets count our blessings and just be happy

hear, the truth lies here

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a dose of laugh [or is it sanity?] - thursday 24th April 2008

A stockbroker was cold-calling about a penny stock and found a taker.

"I think this one will really move,” said the broker, “It's only $1 a share."
"Buy me 1,000 shares," said the client.

The next day the stock was at $2.

The client called the broker and said, "You were right, give me 5,000 more shares."

The next day the client looked in the paper and saw the stock was at $4.

The client ran to the phone and called the broker, "Get me 10,000 more shares,” said the client.

"Great!" said the broker.

The next day the client looked in the paper and saw the stock was at $9.

Seeing what a great profit he had in just a few days, the client ran to the phone and told the broker, "Sell all my shares!"

The broker said, "To whom? You were the only one buying that stock."

 

vasus musings

when you get a unsolicited tip

to gain with little effort a great reward

do remember the saying

fools rush in where angels fear to tread

else you may end up finding

that instead of gaining a cake

you have lost even your bread

 

principled interest in addition of principal

is better than

unprincipled interest in quickly multiplying principal

else one may find others ending up with our principal

and we loosing our interest